{"id":5098,"date":"2009-08-24T15:56:51","date_gmt":"2009-08-24T12:56:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/?p=5098"},"modified":"2009-08-24T15:56:51","modified_gmt":"2009-08-24T12:56:51","slug":"horoscopul-saptamanii-24-30-august-2009","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/2009\/08\/horoscopul-saptamanii-24-30-august-2009\/","title":{"rendered":"Horoscopul s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2nii 24-30 August 2009"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"horoscop\"Se apropie finalul de august iar concediile sunt pe sf\u00e2r\u015fite. Nicu Zglobiu\u2019 s-a \u00eentors din vacan\u0163a petrecut\u0103 \u00een Grecia, dup\u0103 ce a adormit iar cu \u0163igara aprins\u0103. E, nu v\u0103 lua\u0163i dup\u0103 imaginile de la tv, mai exagereaz\u0103 \u015fi ei…Mai bine fi\u0163i aten\u0163i la previziunile pentru aceast\u0103 s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103, a\u015fa cum le-a v\u0103zut Nicu \u00eentr-o \u015fedin\u0163\u0103 de iarb\u0103 ars\u0103. Nu, nu de la incendii…<\/p>\n

Berbec<\/strong>. „Efectul domino” se va abate asupra dvs. \u00een aceast\u0103 s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103. Mar\u0163i, c\u00e2nd ve\u0163i ajunge acas\u0103, o s\u0103 vre\u0163i s\u0103 trage\u0163i ceva pe nas, c\u00e2inele va trage \u015fi el un pic (din gre\u015feal\u0103) \u015fi va muri, so\u0163ul\/so\u0163ia v\u0103 va p\u0103r\u0103si din cauza c\u00e2inelui (dragostea vie\u0163ii ei\/lui – bi\u015fonul maltez), vineri ve\u0163i pierde tot la partaj ( rapid, nu?), s\u00e2mb\u0103t\u0103 v\u0103 ve\u0163i \u00eembiba \u00een alcool iar duminic\u0103 v\u0103 vor da t\u00e2rcoale g\u00e2nduri despre sinucidere. O s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 vesel\u0103!<\/p>\n

Taur<\/strong>. Va fi o s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 foarte lejer\u0103 \u015fi pl\u0103cut\u0103 pentru\u00a0partea feminin\u0103 a\u00a0acestei zodii. A\u0163i ales s\u0103 face\u0163i concediul separat\u0103 de so\u0163, la malul m\u0103rii Egee…Soare e, plaj\u0103 e \u015fi plin de pul#r\u0103i… Ave\u0163i grij\u0103 s\u0103 nu deschide\u0163i ciuperc\u0103rie c\u00e2nd v\u0103 \u00eentoarce\u0163i acas\u0103!<\/p>\n

Gemeni<\/strong>.\u00a0Spiritul artistic al celor din zodia Gemeni va fi temperat de c\u0103tre critici \u015fi pe bun\u0103 dreptate. Fie c\u0103 picta\u0163i, sculpta\u0163i, scrie\u0163i poezii, desena\u0163i graffiti, compune\u0163i muzic\u0103 sau dracu\u2019 mai \u015ftie ce v\u0103 trece prin cap, sunte\u0163i de c\u0103cat, sunte\u0163i de toat\u0103 jena. Astrologul de servici v\u0103 implor\u0103 s\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2ne\u0163i \u00een cas\u0103 \u00een aceast\u0103 s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103. Este spre binele dvs.. Evita\u0163i astfel flegme, \u00eenjur\u0103turi, ro\u015fii stricate \u015fi ou\u0103 clocite!<\/p>\n

Rac<\/strong>. Programul „Prima Cas\u0103” a fost un succes din punctul dvs. de vedere, mai ales c\u0103 a\u0163i cump\u0103rat un apartament \u00eentr-un ansamblu reziden\u0163ial. Ceea ce nu \u015fti\u0163i este c\u0103 vineri o echip\u0103 a Prim\u0103riei Capitalei, \u00een urma unei inspec\u0163ii de rutin\u0103,\u00a0va pune bulin\u0103 ro\u015fie pe blocul dvs. Ve\u0163i fi nevoit s\u0103 v\u0103 muta\u0163i \u00eenapoi cu mama dvs. deoarece noua locuin\u0163\u0103 se va n\u0103rui p\u00e2n\u0103 duminic\u0103. Manole, Manole…b\u0103ga-mi-a\u015f ceva \u00een Ana ta!<\/p>\n

Leu<\/strong>. Sunte\u0163i plin\/\u0103 de inten\u0163ii bune \u015fi ini\u0163iativ\u0103! \u00cen perioada asta de rahat v\u0103 g\u00e2ndi\u0163i s\u0103 \u00eencepe\u0163i o afacere \u015fi ve\u0163i face…un bar. To\u0163i banii str\u00e2n\u015fi p\u00e2n\u0103 acum vor intra \u00een aceast\u0103 c\u00e2rcium\u0103 ca \u00eentr-o gaur\u0103 neagr\u0103. Ve\u0163i reu\u015fi \u00een viitor s\u0103\u00a0ave\u0163i \u015fi activitate,\u00a0clien\u0163i destui,\u00a0critici favorabile, etc.\u00a0Toate bune \u015fi frumoase p\u00e2n\u0103 c\u00e2nd cl\u0103direa \u00een care se afl\u0103 barul va fi retrocedat\u0103 \u015fi d\u0103r\u00e2mat\u0103 mai apoi, \u00een dou\u0103 zile, la ordinul proprietarului. P\u0103cat ca nu ve\u0163i reu\u015fi s\u0103 str\u00e2nge\u0163i nimic din bar!<\/p>\n

Fecioara<\/strong>. Ve\u0163i pleca \u00een acest week-end, ultimul din luna august, \u00eempreun\u0103 cu partenerul\/partenera la mare. Pl\u0103nui\u0163i asta de foarte mult timp \u015fi abia a\u015ftepta\u0163i s\u0103 ajunge\u0163i pe plaja din Costine\u015fti,\u00a0v\u0103 leag\u0103 foarte multe amintiri de acest loc: prima noapte de dragoste, primul viol, primul sex \u00een grup, cel mai bun oral, primul \u015fi singurul anal…Dac\u0103 dorea\u0163i s\u0103 mai retr\u0103i\u0163i ceva de genul acesta nu v\u0103 mai g\u00e2ndi\u0163i, c\u0103ci e degeaba…O s\u0103 ave\u0163i parte doar de o toxinfec\u0163ie alimentar\u0103…poate o clism\u0103, merge? Cine \u015ftie!<\/p>\n

Balan\u0163a<\/strong>. Nimic nu se compar\u0103 cu o Balan\u0163\u0103 \u00eendr\u0103gostit\u0103…poate dou\u0103 Balan\u0163e \u00eendr\u0103gostite, adic\u0103 previziunea noastr\u0103 astral\u0103. Ei bine da, v-a\u0163i g\u0103sit partenerul\/partenera din aceea\u015fi zodie, contrar tuturor a\u015ftept\u0103rilor. Nu v\u0103 bucura\u0163i foarte tare, spiritul dvs. analitic, la fel ca cel al partenerului, v\u0103 va face s\u0103 v\u0103 desp\u0103r\u0163i\u0163i spre finalul s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2nii din motive de c\u0103cat: are barb\u0103\/n-are \u0163\u00e2\u0163e, e prea scund\/are curu’ mare, \u00eenceput de chelie\/un pic cr\u0103c\u0103nat\u0103, „n-are bani”\/”s-ar putea s\u0103 m\u0103 sug\u0103 de bani”…lua\u0163i exemplu de la Scorpion!<\/p>\n

Scorpion<\/strong>. Acorda\u0163i o aten\u0163ie at\u00e2t de mare aspectului fizic, \u015fi nu numai, \u00eenc\u00e2t a\u0163i putea redefini termenul de narcisist. V\u0103 place de dvs. \u00een orice situa\u0163ie \u015fi, oricum, nu sunte\u0163i foarte ur\u00e2t\/\u0103 pentru cei din jur, dep\u0103\u015find c\u00e2t de c\u00e2t mediocritatea. Sunte\u0163i atr\u0103g\u0103tor\/atr\u0103g\u0103toare \u015fi nu rata\u0163i nimic…\u201dc\u0103lca\u0163i\u201d tot ce prinde\u0163i: gra\u015fi\/grase, cr\u0103c\u0103na\u0163i\/cr\u0103c\u0103nate, paro\u015fi\/f\u0103r\u0103 \u0163\u00e2\u0163e, pitici\/cu mega-cur…S\u0103 le mul\u0163umi\u0163i Balan\u0163elor pentru aceste firimituri. \u015ei \u00eenc\u0103 ceva\u00a0: nu v\u0103 mai atinge\u0163i singuri at\u00e2t de des!<\/p>\n

S\u0103get\u0103tor<\/strong>. A\u0163i v\u0103zut focurile alea de la greci? C\u00e2t\u0103 panic\u0103, ce dezastru! Miercuri sau joi ve\u0163i petrece dou\u0103 zile la casa de vacan\u0163\u0103 de la munte. Ve\u0163i avea parte de o noapte de co\u015fmar, un muc de \u0163igar\u0103 va declan\u015fa dezastrul…ce s\u0103-i faci, a\u015fa e cu fum\u0103torii \u00eenr\u0103i\u0163i. V\u0103 sf\u0103tuiesc ca de acum \u00eenainte s\u0103 citi\u0163i horoscopul lui Nicu Zglobiu\u2019 de pe revistacioburi.ro! (O spun spre binele dvs., nu se \u015ftie niciodat\u0103 ce vor prevedea astrele pentru s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na viitoare)<\/p>\n

Capricorn<\/strong>. \u00cen sf\u00e2r\u015fit, e s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na cea mare pentru domni\u015fori! Ve\u0163i merge \u00een vizit\u0103 la p\u0103rin\u0163ii domni\u015foarei. Vestea bun\u0103 este c\u0103 nu ve\u0163i avea emo\u0163ii \u015fi c\u0103 socrul este foarte de treab\u0103. De fapt, mai mult dec\u00e2t de treab\u0103. Ve\u0163i descoperi asta diminea\u0163a, dup\u0103 cele c\u00e2teva zeci de beri pe care le ve\u0163i bea \u00eempreun\u0103. \u015ei nu, nu v\u0103 va durea capul, ci altceva. Pentru doamne \u015fi domni\u015foare, s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na care vine le rezerv\u0103 o petrecere cu prietenii. Foarte frumos, ve\u0163i spune…Da, numai c\u0103 prietenii sunt ai iubitului \u015fi acum \u00eei ve\u0163i cunoa\u015fte pentru prima dat\u0103. O s\u0103 v\u0103 da\u0163i seama din pozele de pe internet \u00een ce pozi\u0163ii i-a\u0163i cunoscut.<\/p>\n

V\u0103rs\u0103tor<\/strong>. Ve\u0163i \u00eencepe ziua de mar\u0163i cum nu se poate mai prost. La ie\u015firea din scar\u0103 ve\u0163i c\u0103lca \u00eentr-un mare rahat, plantat acolo de copii vecinului de la parter. V\u0103 \u00eentoarce\u0163i \u00een cas\u0103 pentru a v\u0103 schimba \u00eenc\u0103l\u0163\u0103mintea dar ve\u0163i r\u0103m\u00e2ne blocat\/\u0103 \u00een lift. Nimic spectaculos, \u00een afar\u0103 de mirosul insuportabil \u015fi de faptul c\u0103, brusc, v\u0103 scap\u0103 treaba mare. Lucru cre v\u0103 aduce aminte de cina de seara de dinainte. Asta e, oricum nu v\u0103 vede nimeni. Ghinion! Tocmai c\u00e2nd v\u0103 ridica\u0163i pantalonii, administratorul porne\u015fte liftul. N-ar fi o problem\u0103 s\u0103 spune\u0163i c\u0103 a\u015fa a\u0163i g\u0103sit liftul, p\u0103cat c\u0103 v\u0103 tr\u0103deaz\u0103 s\u00e2mburii de pepene pe jum\u0103tate digera\u0163i care vi se scurg din pantaloni. Borala administratorului, direct pe c\u0103ma\u015fa dvs., nu se mai pune. Mai conteaz\u0103 restul s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2nii?<\/p>\n

Pe\u015fti<\/strong>. S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na aceasta ve\u0163i primi o invita\u0163ie de a merge la pescuit, de la noii vecini de apartament. Ve\u0163i insista s\u0103 merge\u0163i cu ma\u015fina dvs., mai ales c\u0103 abia a\u0163i luat-o \u015fi dori\u0163i s\u0103 v\u0103 m\u00e2ndri\u0163i cu ea. Toate bune \u015fi frumoase, ve\u0163i petrece dou\u0103 zile de neuitat. Abia la \u00eentoarcere ve\u0163i realiza c\u0103 v-a\u0163i \u00eentors f\u0103r\u0103 ma\u015fin\u0103, f\u0103r\u0103 pe\u015fte, f\u0103r\u0103 haine \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 \u015fti\u0163i ce s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat. De fapt, ve\u0163i fi for\u0163at s\u0103 \u00eenv\u0103\u0163a\u0163i limba bulgar\u0103 pentru c\u0103, din cauze necunoscute, nu v-a\u0163i \u00eentors acas\u0103 ci a\u0163i trecut grani\u0163a la sud. Nici m\u0103car Nicu Zglobiu\u2019 nu \u015ftie ce naiba se petrece. Mai bine sta\u0163i \u00een cas\u0103 \u015fi da\u0163i-i una vecinului dac\u0103 v\u0103 invit\u0103 undeva.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Se apropie finalul de august iar concediile sunt pe sf\u00e2r\u015fite. Nicu Zglobiu\u2019 s-a \u00eentors din vacan\u0163a petrecut\u0103 \u00een Grecia, dup\u0103 ce a adormit iar cu \u0163igara aprins\u0103. E, nu v\u0103 lua\u0163i dup\u0103 imaginile de la …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[87,103],"tags":[1592],"class_list":["post-5098","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-cate-n-luna-si-stele-verzi","category-promo","tag-horoscop"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5098","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5098"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5098\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5098"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5098"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5098"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}