{"id":6967,"date":"2010-01-13T18:54:04","date_gmt":"2010-01-13T15:54:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/?p=6967"},"modified":"2010-01-13T18:54:04","modified_gmt":"2010-01-13T15:54:04","slug":"doctorul-pilda-a-revenit","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/2010\/01\/doctorul-pilda-a-revenit\/","title":{"rendered":"Doctorul Pild\u0103 a revenit"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0\u00a0 Stima\u0163i r\u0103t\u0103ci\u0163i printre elucubra\u0163iile pline de\u00a0inteligen\u0163\u0103\u00a0ale <strong>Revistei Cioburi<\/strong>, iat\u0103 c\u0103 s-a terminat prima serie de foc automat a s\u0103rb\u0103torilor cre\u015ftine\u015fti de iarn\u0103 (av\u00e2nd mai mereu efecte necre\u015ftine\u015fti), ceea ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 unii din consumatorii bipezi de oxigen au \u00eenceput s\u0103-\u015fi fac\u0103 de lucru pentru a scoate o p\u00e2ine sau o bere. \u00cen aceea\u015fi situa\u0163ie se g\u0103se\u015fte \u015fi mega-celebrul specialist al <strong><em>Departamentului de Rela\u0163ionare<\/em> <em>cu Min\u0163i Odihnite<\/em><\/strong> al redac\u0163iei, cine altul dac\u0103 nu <strong><em>Doctorul Pild\u0103<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0 Re\u00eentors dintr-un stagiu de preg\u0103tire profesional\u0103, consumat la socrii s\u0103i, doctorul nostru a \u00eenv\u0103\u0163at, printre altele, c\u0103 \u0163uica nu \u00ee\u0163i m\u0103re\u015fte IQ-ul dar te poate ajuta s\u0103 \u00een\u0163elegi necuv\u00e2nt\u0103toarele (cu suflet sau f\u0103r\u0103) \u015fi c\u0103 sporind treptat cantit\u0103\u0163ile de alimente cu baz\u0103 porcin\u0103, po\u0163i descoperi \u00een tine un organism destul de elastic, capabil s\u0103-\u015fi m\u0103reasc\u0103 impresionant volumul \u00eentr-un timp scurt. Restul sunt doar b\u0103\u015fini \u015fi c\u0103cat. A\u015fadar, re\u00eentors \u00een mijlocul biroului s\u0103u decorat cu mobilier Ludovic al XV-lea \u015fi \u00eemprosp\u0103tat de duhoarea porcu\u015forilor s\u0103i de Guineea, uita\u0163i f\u0103r\u0103 m\u00e2ncare, <strong><em>Doctorul Pild\u0103<\/em><\/strong> a g\u0103sit \u00een cutia sa po\u015ftal\u0103 un mesaj de la un domn \u00eencovoiat de probleme. Iat\u0103 mesajul:<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u201eBun\u0103 ziua! M\u0103 numesc Otto Pipirig V\u00e2njescu \u015fi v\u0103 deranjez \u00eentr-o chestiune&#8230; De cur\u00e2nd, am aflat c\u0103 amanta m\u0103 \u00een\u015feal\u0103. De\u015fi am f\u0103cut at\u00e2tea pentru ea, inclusiv fur\u00e2ndu-i nevestei mele din lenjerie \u015fi oferindu-i-o cadou, bijuterii, vacan\u0163e, cas\u0103, mas\u0103, ce mai, am fost un domn, am aflat cu stupoare \u015fi destul\u0103 mirare \u00een suflet c\u0103 d\u00e2nsa prime\u015fte la ecluz\u0103 un pionier mai t\u00e2n\u0103r, mult mai s\u0103rac \u015fi mai neatent cu ea. Acum, eu am cerut sfatul nevestei dar, din p\u0103cate, m-am trezit cu bagajele la u\u015f\u0103 \u015fi cu o cerere de divor\u0163 \u00een poale (deci, nu este cu mine \u015fi la bine \u015fi la r\u0103u dar o s\u0103 v\u0103 cer sfatul \u00een aceast\u0103 privin\u0163\u0103 alt\u0103 dat\u0103), plus c\u0103 o perioad\u0103 o s\u0103 merg oarecum mai cr\u0103c\u0103nat. Cred c\u0103 m\u0103 \u00een\u0163elege\u0163i \u00een ce situa\u0163ie m\u0103 aflu \u015fi c\u00e2t de greu \u00eemi este. Rug\u0103mintea mea este, de aceea am \u00eendr\u0103znit cu acest mesaj, s\u0103-mi spune\u0163i unde a\u015f putea g\u0103si un cabinet de avocatur\u0103 mai ieftin dar bun, astfel \u00eenc\u00e2t s\u0103 pot r\u0103m\u00e2ne cu casa pe numele meu.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Stimate domn Pipirig (sau V\u00e2njescu, cred..), ce pot s\u0103 v\u0103 spun&#8230; \u00cen primul r\u00e2nd, permite\u0163i-mi s\u0103-mi exprim nedumerirea  fa\u0163\u0103 de \u00eentrebarea dvs.. M\u0103 a\u015fteptam, a\u015fa cum \u00eencepuse mesajul, s\u0103-mi cere\u0163i sfatul \u00een privin\u0163a rec\u00e2\u015ftig\u0103rii amantei (sau poate a nevestei), c\u0103ci acesta este domeniul meu de specialitate (hei, doctor love&#8230;). Din ce am urm\u0103rit eu \u00een text, se pare c\u0103 domni\u015foarei \u00eei lipsea smotocelul dvs., \u00eemi permit s\u0103 v\u0103 spun&#8230; Haina e hain\u0103, vacan\u0163a e vacan\u0163\u0103, p\u0103pica e p\u0103pic\u0103 dar, sti\u0163i cum e, probabil \u00eei era dor de pul\u0103 ca de m\u0103-sa \u015fi ta-su. \u015ei uite a\u015fa amanta dvs. a ajuns s\u0103-\u015fi caute de c\u0103\u0163eleal\u0103 la un alt exemplar t\u00e2n\u0103r, cu un pedigree puternic \u00eentre membrele inferioare. \u00centr-adev\u0103r, so\u0163ia dvs. Trebuia s\u0103 v\u0103 ajute cu un sfat, pentru c\u0103 doar este femeie \u015fi vede altfel lucrurile dar, iat\u0103, se pare c\u0103\u00a0 nu v\u0103 iubea \u015fi v-a \u00een\u015felat a\u015ftept\u0103rile at\u00e2\u0163ia ani. S\u0103-i fie ru\u015fine, a\u015fa s\u0103-i spune\u0163i!<\/p>\n<p>Acum, s\u0103 v\u0103 r\u0103spund la \u00eentrebare&#8230; Habar nu am, domnule Pipirig (sau poate Otto&#8230;?) unde s\u0103 g\u0103si\u0163i un cabinet de avocatur\u0103 ieftin \u015fi bun. \u015ei nici nu m\u0103 intereseaz\u0103, da?<\/p>\n<p>V\u0103 a\u015ftept \u015fi cu alte mesaje.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Doctorul Pild\u0103.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0\u00a0 Stima\u0163i r\u0103t\u0103ci\u0163i printre elucubra\u0163iile pline de\u00a0inteligen\u0163\u0103\u00a0ale Revistei Cioburi, iat\u0103 c\u0103 s-a terminat prima serie de foc automat a s\u0103rb\u0103torilor cre\u015ftine\u015fti de iarn\u0103 (av\u00e2nd mai mereu efecte necre\u015ftine\u015fti), ceea ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 unii din consumatorii &hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[30,103],"tags":[245,772,1108,2063,2508,2779,3053,3139],"class_list":["post-6967","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-aberatia-de-intelect","category-promo","tag-amanta","tag-cioburi","tag-doctor","tag-mesaj","tag-pilda","tag-raspuns","tag-sfat","tag-sotie"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6967","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6967"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6967\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6967"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6967"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistacioburi.ro\/revistacioburi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6967"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}